Touching the Heart…through Art!
Cezanne is a Self-taught Visual & Spoken Word Artist, and Author of the self-help novel ‘Journey of a Sister’, which features her artwork and poetry.
In 1998 I asked my Creator what my purpose was, and received the reply; “To Spread LOVE through Creativity!” The problem was, my natural gifts of writing and art had been lying dormant for over 15 years. My first thought was “That’s LOVE-ly!” but my second thought was “Who am I to spread Love?”
I was suffering from a ‘Self Love deficit’, having grown up neglected of hugs and kisses, or being told “I love you.” This had led to me being unable to give or receive love properly, and to low self-esteem. I had Self Love issues – I didn’t even know how to love myself!
I was a single mother of two young boys aged 3 and 5. I had turned down the opportunity to marry someone who truly loved me, only to have children with a man who didn’t love me at all!
Yet I was building a beautiful loving relationship with my ‘Heavenly Father’, who I experienced as Pure, Unconditional LOVE. Having children of my own helped me understand God’s Unconditional Love for me. It was in one of my quiet times in God’s presence that I discovered my soul purpose. But before I could begin fulfilling it, I had to do some work on myself – and God had some work to do on me too.
In 2000 I started channelling loving messages from ‘the Poet in the sky’, such as “Look to Me!”, Jesus Never Left You…, and “Call Me by My Name!”
In 2001 I launched my first creative business, selling inspirational posters featuring my ‘prophetic poetry’. “Look to Me!” now features in Year One of Journey of a Sister:
2001 was also the year I met my Twin Soul, which triggered my ‘Awakening’. I was a Christian, he wasn’t, which caused inner conflict for me. I broke up with him reluctantly, which led me to write a fearless letter to God. I challenged the Fall of Adam and Eve story, the battle between God and the devil (in which we’re caught in the middle), Faith, and Free Will. I ended it by asking for “the Truth!”:
This marked a turning-point in my life. I started attracting books, seminars and courses that taught Universal Laws, and the creative power of our thoughts. I spent years studying books like The Magic of Thinking Big, Feel the Fear And Do It Anyway, and Awaken the Giant Within. They all quoted scriptures even though they weren’t Christian books.
The Story of my Inner Child
The book I credit with helping me to unblock as a writer and artist is The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron.
It taught me how to nurture my inner child, and to think of myself as a channel for the Creator to create through. It was a painful inner process; when I finally unblocked, one of the first poems I wrote was ‘My Artist Child’ (inspired by the book), and the first painting I did when I unblocked as an artist in 2009 was of my inner child!
I began fulfilling my soul purpose in 2001 with the Love Inspires… project. It involved organizing a series of poetry workshops to teach closet poets like myself how to take our poetry from the page to the stage (I hired a workshop facilitator). I also received funding to co-ordinate a compilation poetry CD featuring 10 poets from the BME community (including myself). The project culminated with a Valentine’s Date, also called ‘Love Inspires…’ where we explored the theme “What is the true meaning of the word ‘Love’?” through poetry, music, dance, drama and comedy! I organized this Valentine’s event for three years consecutively, and had no problem filling the hall with 200-250 people.
Unbeknown to me at the time, I was assigned a government agent as soon as I started ‘waking up’, and fulfilling my soul purpose in 2001. I lost my home through a psychic attack in 2003, moved in with the agent, had a child for him, and stopped fulfilling my purpose.
I moved out in 2007 and started to get my life back on track. However I came under another severe psychic attack, which rendered me homeless again, and separated me from my children.
Undoing the Indoctrination
I left church in 2007 and entered the Black ‘conscious’ community. I joined a Black History course with Robin Walker, where I learned the true history of my ancestors before they were enslaved. Learning my history gave me a new sense of pride in myself as a Black Woman, and in my self-identity. I grew locs, which symbolized my search for my ‘roots’.
I also learned the his-story of Christianity, and how it had played a big part in the enslavement of my ancestors and in colonising Africa, my Motherland. I began the process of ‘undoing the indoctrination’.
Between 2008-10 I painted my first collection, inspired by nature. In the process I healed myself from Seasonal Affective Disorder (a form of depression caused by lack of natural sunlight). This led me to study, and then to teach Colour Therapy.
(Facilitating a Colour Therapy workshop at Brixton Library)
I held my first exhibition in 2009 at the Bernie Grant Arts Centre, where I also launched my new range of greeting cards and prints featuring my artwork and poetry. I also took part in a number of other exhibitions.
Seeds of Love
Between 2008-10 I also collaborated with an acoustic guitarist, Theo Calliste, and wrote lyrics to 8 of his compositions – most of my paintings have a complimentary poem or poem-song, which you can listen to on the Art page. In 2010 I produced my debut poetry CD Seeds of Love which also features a djembe drummer, pianist and saxophonist.
In 2010 I watched the film ‘Sankofa‘ which traumatized me, and changed my life forever. For the first time I recognized that as the descendant of an enslaved African, I was still carrying the trauma of my ancestors in my DNA. I could also see how my community were still suffering a form of PTSD, which had been passed down genetically. I asked “What can I do to help my people heal?” The following morning, I woke up and was led to switch on my recording equipment. I played one of Theo’s tracks and recorded this poem without writing it first:
We Belong Together features on my debut poetry CD.
Not long after this I started writing the First Edition of my novel. 46,000 were channelled, meaning they came through me rather than from me. I was led to include my poetry and art to illustrate the story, and the front cover design. I published it in 2012 under the title ‘Single, Spiritual…AND Sexual!’
In 2013 I published ‘How to Get the Ring On Your Finger‘ which has contributions from over 30 brothers! I hosted a number of events where we discussed the topics raised in my books openly.
Visiting my Motherland
In 2014 I visited my Motherland, Ghana for the first time. I performed my poem ‘Who Am I?’ in the dungeon of Cape Coast Castle, where my ancestors had been held captive before being shipped off to work on the plantations for free. Some of the photos used in this video are from that pilgrimage:
Upon my return to the UK I revised my novel, added two new chapters (inspired by my 5 month stay), and re-titled the Second Edition ‘Journey of a Sister’.
In 2018 I spent 5 months in the Gambia where I facilitated The Self Love Retreat. I was in the process of setting up a Retreat Home there, when I came under another vicious psychic attack which made me almost commit suicide, and put me in a psychiatric ward for a month.
In 2019 whilst still in recovery, I turned my novel into a film script, revised the book to match the film script (I wrote some new scenes!) and in 2020 I recorded it as an audiobook.
There was a poem in Year Four of my novel which I had never recorded, because I thought it was too sad – but I was forced to record it for the audiobook! My youngest son Azzy is playing the piano, and my friend Wadada is playing the sax:
The Third and final Edition is now available in e-book and audiobooks – the paperback will be out in time for my book tour!
In 2021 I wrote a blog a day for ‘Black His-story Month’, covering topics like the his-story of Christianity, how sacred geometry relates to Jesus’ ministry, why the Divine Mother was removed from the Creation story, who the Black Woman is, and why she has been vilified by those who have usurped her position. You can also learn why we need to honour our ancestors, and much more! It’s now a resource you can refer to 365 days of the year!
These are my contributions to help my community heal from ancestral trauma, and to help them reconnect with their Motherland. Africa is a living, breathing being, who is like an enslaved woman who has had her wrists and ankles tied down, and is being raped repeatedly. She is so fertile, that the more she produces, the more they take. Her wealth-creating gold, diamonds, oil, precious metals, and fertile land were meant as an in-her-itance for her children (Africans and their descendants). Instead, it is being diverted and distributed to Europeans, who want Africans to remain in poverty. Africans and their descendants must return to the Motherland to help free her – until our Motherland is free, we won’t be free (that is the message she gave me).
I shared everything I discovered since asking God for “the Truth!” in my novel, which is for brothers as well!
Journey of a Sister isn’t just a beautiful Black Love story, it’s packed with ancestral wisdom, and is designed to take you on your own personal journey of Self-discovery, self-healing and to discover ‘True Love’:
Download a preview of Year One FREE on the Books page; if you’re a Kindle Unlimited member, borrow the e-book series from their lending library FREE!
In 2016 I was a speaker at the Natural November tour, which covered London, Manchester and Birmingham. My speech was titled ‘Be-YOU-ti-full, Naturally!‘
In 2017 I organized the Kings & Queens Book Tour and invited TC Carrier, author of The Secret Science of Black Male and Female Sex and King Kevin Dorival, author of 7 Types of Queens Kings Desire over from the USA to join me in revealing the secret to Black Male and Female sexuality!
Religion separates sex from spirituality which leaves us in conflict with our true nature. The aim of the book tour was to share how sex and spirituality go hand in hand, and to explain the proper use of sexual energy.
Fort Lauderdale Book Festival
In 2017 I was a Featured Author at the South Florida Book Festival, courtesy of King Kevin Dorival who took part in the Kings and Queens Book Tour. They had chosen to feature my book How to Get the Ring On Your Finger, so I had to explain why I had chosen not to marry despite having the (engagement) ring on twice!
I hosted many Book Signing & Discussion Events where we discussed the topics raised in my Self-help books.
Where am I now on ‘the journey’?
I left the Black ‘conscious’ community, but won’t be going back to church. Moving forward, I’m seeking to re-establish the close relationship I had with my Creator minus the religious indoctrination. At the same time, I want to acknowledge my African ancestry, and honour my ancestors. Now that I know the bible was plagiarized from stolen ancient manuscripts in order to create man-made religions, I refuse to read it – even though it still contains a lot of Truth.
I’m still on my way to self-actualizing as God in the flesh (I am a great create-her), and to re-minding my people who they are, so they can re-member (put themselves back together again).
I’m still fulfilling my soul purpose of spreading LOVE through Creativity, starting with love for Self, love for my people, and then the wider community. I became a Targeted Individual as soon as I started ‘waking up’, which leads me to believe that the government knew who I was even before I did, just like Neo in The Matrix. My life’s work has been about the creative power of our thoughts, so it stands to reason why I was assigned an agent adept in mind control techniques.
Despite covert government operations trying to prevent me from benefitting financially from my creations, I continue to create because that’s who I am (a great create-her).
My aim is to re-mind others of who they are too.
The debilitating psychic attacks I’ve endured over the past 20 years has led to cognitive decline, and a technological attack in 2016 shut down my natural ability to see into the fifth dimension, which is where I receive inspiration to write and paint from. Fortunately, plant medicines have helped me communicate with the spiritual realm again, to a certain degree.
I am the proud mother of 3 ‘suns’, the jewels in my crown:
Taken for my 50th birthday
I trust you enjoyed learning some of my her-story! As an indie Author I rely on word of mouth referrals to promote my books, art and poetry. Please share this link so your friends and family can start their journey of Self-discovery!
You can also download Journey of a Sister in e-book and audiobooks, download my poems as mp3’s, and download my paintings to use as screensavers so you can benefit from the Colour Therapy in them!
If you would like help to DISCOVER and FULFIL your Soul Purpose, join my Tribe – all over 18’s welcome!
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In your service,
Artist | Poetess| Author| Blogger | Soul Purpose Tribe Leader
Promoting LOVE through Creativity!
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Cezanne has been interviewed on a number of radio shows including BBC radio, BenTV, Galaxy, Conscious radio, Inspire Network, BlackIceTV and No Ordinary Woman Chat Show. Click on the image above to watch her interview on the No Ordinary Woman Chat Show.
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