In 2002, I wrote a fearless letter to God which changed the course of my her-story.
Up until that point, I walked closely with the Lord, spending quality time at home developing our relationship by reading His Word, praying, singing praise songs, and sitting in the silence waiting to hear back from Him. I could hear the voice of God as clear as if I was talking with you. I looked forward to my time in His presence after putting the boys to bed in the evening, or when I woke early in the morning. There is not a more beautiful feeling than being in the presence of God!
Soon, God began inspiring me to write prophetic poetry (messages from God based on His Word), such as “Look to Me”, which now features in Year One of Journey of a Sister:
Somewhere along the line I opened the door to the devil, which I now believe was through sex with someone who was involved in the occult, unbeknown to me at the time.
One night I (must have) got up, typed the letter on my laptop, and went back to sleep. I have no recollection of writing it but I knew I did, because there were references in it that were personal. Besides, I had a Father-daughter relationship with God where I felt I could tell Him anything.
But how could I write such a long, articulate letter without remembering? I recorded the letter in 2002:
I put it up on my Myspace ‘Poetry Spoken Word‘, along with my Christian poetry. I truly believed it was God who had inspired it.
However not long after, I descended into a deep depression. I kept seeing black crows on the roof of the house God had blessed me with, and I couldn’t think clearly – it was as if my mind was in a thick fog. We had a major flood which resulted in a big hole in my living room ceiling, and not long after, I was evicted from my secure tenancy.
The day before I was evicted, God sat me down and gave me the poem ‘Jesus Never Left You…‘ as if letting me know that no matter how far I stray from Him, he will always be there ready to pick up where we left off.
By 2003, I had moved in with my ‘business mentor’, and in 2004 had his son. When my son was two years old, I discovered that his (Nigerian) father was secretly having sex with men.
Years later, I discovered that my son’s father had been using psychic attacks on me to 1) Draw me to him when I wasn’t attracted to him at all 2) To make me lose my home so I would move in with him 3) Sign my son over to him.
These are just a few instances of mind control. I mention them because I want you to see how easy it can be to ‘lose your mind’. In this day and age, mind control is prevalent. I have just shown you a few instances where I was under mind control, simply because I came out from under God’s Divine Protection.
Getting back to the letter.
Today is my 53rd birthday. Looking back on my life, I’ve tried to pinpoint where everything started to go wrong for me, and it seems to be the year I wrote the letter, which I titled ‘The Rebellion‘. It’s title had a double meaning; not only was the letter analysing Lucifer’s rebellion and the fall of mankind, it also referenced my own rebellion against God.
MIND CONTROL IS REAL!
I’m pretty sure I was under mind control. How else could I have written such a long letter with no memory of it? It was as if I’d had a total black-out of memory, or perhaps it was ‘auto-written’ (some people call this ‘channelling’). Either way, I didn’t write it consciously.
As a child, I suffered psychological trauma which weakened my mind. A weak mind is easily controlled. During their 400 years of enslavement, my ancestors were whipped mercilessly in order to break them down mentally. This made it easier for their oppressors to re-program their minds to think how they wanted them to think. Being the descendant of an enslaved African, I carry that trauma in my DNA. On top of that, I was further brutalized by my own mother physically and verbally, because she too was carrying the trauma in her genes.
Despite this, I could hear from God, my Creator. I know the still, small voice of God. But there is also a god of this world, who does his best to counterfeit the True and Living God, and he especially comes after people like me, who are called with special gifts to further God’s kingdom.
I WAS DECEIVED.
I went from using my gifts of writing and art to glorify God, to using them to further the kingdom of darkness. It was so subtle, that I didn’t even notice. In fact, Satan disguises himself as an angel of light, and without the spirit of discernment, we can be easily fooled into thinking we are following God.
The good news is, GOD ALWAYS CAUSES US TO TRIUMPH IN CHRIST JESUS.
My Father knew I was going to go off track in life, which is why He gave me the poem ‘Jesus Never Left You‘ in 2002. I’m now finding my way back to the path, having strayed so far away, ending up in the Black ‘conscious’ community, learning about my African ancestry, giving honour to my ancestors, channelling messages from ancient Kemet (Egypt), or so I thought, learning how to meditate and even practicing rituals.
Recently, I’ve been watching videos on YouTube of ex-Satanists who turned to Christ when they realized that the power in the name of Jesus was stronger than the power given to them by the devil.
There are many people (especially in the entertainment industry) who have sold their soul to the devil. They undergo MK Ultra mind control as part of their initiation; even these people can be brought back from darkness into Gods marvellous light. I was heading deeper and deeper into darkness while thinking it was leading me to the light. In the process I lost my homes, money, car, husband(s), businesses, and despite writing books, doing paintings and recording numerous poems, my life was an unstable mess. Everything I desired, I got the opposite. The Law of Attraction was a deception to me.
I was being led to my death. I started getting suicidal thoughts, and even bought the tablets and booked myself into a hotel room.
It was God who reached down and pulled me out of the pit I had dug for myself; I truly would not be here today if it wasn’t for His intervention. Just the same way as Lucifer sent his messengers to draw me away and break me down, God sent his messengers to rescue me and help me get back on track. He is now preparing me to be a warrior for His kingdom, to bind and loose, and do warfare against the kingdom of darkness.
This has nothing to do with ‘churchianity’. This is about a relationship with your Creator who LOVES YOU. This is not a false love that leads to misery and woe. Sometimes I wonder how I strayed so far from God when I had such a close relationship with Him. After learning everything I ‘needed to know’, I realized all that really mattered was my relationship with God!
One of the things I discovered is that Lucifer likes to keep you in your MIND, because he can control your mind, but HE CAN’T CONTROL YOUR HEART. This is why there’s so much focus on meditation, mindfulness, hypnosis etc, it’s all part of the enemies plan to CONTROL YOUR MIND.
Give your HEART to Christ!
Now I don’t believe in throwing the baby out with the bathwater, so I know there are many good things about what I produced, for instance, the Colour Therapy in my paintings, the LOVE OF GOD expressed through my writing, and the fact that God can turn anything around for HIS GLORY!
THANK YOU JESUS!
While doing research about ‘aliens’ (which are really fallen angels) I discovered that when people who had been abducted by these aliens called on the name ‘JESUS’, Christian or not, the experience would stop. Yes, there IS power in the name of Jesus and the blood of Jesus, which is to be used in spiritual warfare. If Lucifer can make you believe he doesn’t exist, and that there’s no power in the name of Jesus, he will be able to attack you left, right and centre (which is what was happening to me!)
I’m going to be doing a series of videos to walk you through Journey of a Sister, because it’s still relevant; I want you to see where I went off track, so you don’t make the same ‘mustakes’. If you haven’t read it yet…
In your service,
Cezanne Taharqa aka Cezanne Poetes
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